12.24.2015 Weekly Torah Portion

[RabbiMark]

This week’s Parasha is VaYechi (and he lived). This is the last Parashah of the Book of Genesis and it usually comes around the end of the secular year. My thoughts are on endings and beginnings today. There is a saying, Hazak, Hazak, V’Nithazak that we say at the end of every Book of the Torah. I translate this as: strength, strength, and we are strong. We all know that we never stop reading/studying/living Torah so this saying is to remind us, I believe, that while endings are hard and sad at times, each ending has a new beginning following it.

What are you ending this week, this year? What new beginnings are you making? How will you use the strength of your experience of Genesis/this year to help you grow in the next year/Book of Torah?

One of the experiences that people talk to me about regarding endings is how they don’t understand why things have to end. I hear this a lot when loss occurs. We all know that death is inevitable, yet we question why someone dies when they do; we question what happens next. Next Friday evening, January 1, 2016, according to the Hebrew Calendar, is the 50th anniversary of my father, Jerry Borovitz’ death and the 15th anniversary of my brother, Stuart Borovitz’ death. I remember my sister, Sheri Borovitz-Linda, asking me as a 5-year old, “Why did Daddy die?” I had no real answer for her; I made something up, and I realize that, while I can recite the science of his death, no one has a Spiritual answer to why anyone dies when they do. I now realize that why someone dies is the wrong question, in my humble opinion. The best question is: How did they live? Rabbi Heschel says, I believe, that when life is an answer, death is a homecoming. My father and brother lived lives of decency and holiness. They were not saints; they were two human beings who did their best to treat everyone else as a human being. No one was above or below them; all of us were equal ‘children of God;’ each of us are/were unique souls to appreciate according to the way they lived their lives. I do not know what happened to them when they came home to God. I do know that they are present and guides for me and my family to this day. I know that I can call upon their spirits to help me, soothe me, and guide me to doing the next right thing in all of my affairs. I know that they live on eternally in my brother Neal, my sister Sheri, Stuart’s children, the grandchildren and nieces and nephews of my brother Stuart. So, maybe I do know what happened next when they died. They live.

Are you asking the best questions when death occurs? How are you ensuring that the life of your loved ones continues to give and thrive? How are you ensuring eternal life for those who have died?

I just truly understand this Parasha for the first time. After writing the last sentence of the above paragraph, “They live,” I now get one of the things we are to learn from this Parasha. We continue to live even after our death. We are called the Children of Israel, the Sons of Jacob to remind us of where we come from and to use the lessons of Jacob’s life to help our lives grow and be one grain of sand better each day. While Jacob wasn’t perfect, he perfectly teaches us about the need to continue to wrestle with all of our parts: our Israel/Divine part and our Jacob/earthly desire part. In this Parashah, Jacob wrestles with Joseph and his feelings about his favored son, he wrestles with his feelings for his other sons, he wrestles with sharing prophecy, and the brothers wrestle again with their own fears and guilt. In all of this wrestling, they are living.

How are you using the experiences of your elders and ancestors to live today? When does the Israel/Divine part of you win the daily/moment by moment wrestling match? How are you using the experiences of Torah to live well today?

Shabbat Shalom,
Rabbi Mark