Beit T'Shuvah Blog » Dating

Interacting With The Opposite Sex

By Chris Alvarez How do you find interacting with the opposite sex without alcohol? Its strange, I used to need “Man in a Can” to be able to interact with girls. I had no confidence. I thought nothing of myself.  My ego told me drink and then maybe girls would like me, it worked for a night or two, but then it didn’t. Alcohol was a tool I used to get over my anxiety and low self-esteem. It was useful until it wasn’t and then it just hurt me and degraded me.  The very thing I was using to help me feel better and give me “confidence” was just bringing me down. There was a point when I realized this but couldn’t stop drinking on my own. However once I stopped drinking and began … Read entire article »

Filed under: 12-Steps, addiction, Current Events, Dating, Gratitude, Sobriety, Uncategorized

Attention Please!!!!

By Chris Alvarez Why do all the “deadbeats”, the people that disappoint us, the people that fall get so much attention? And the winners, the people that succeed, those who try so hard to do the next right thing get little to no attention for their actions?  In the “real world” this isn’t the case but in the world of recovery it’s the sad truth. Do people root for the underdog or do they look at them as a way of seeing how much better off they are. Do they see a part of themselves in that person who just cant seem to do anything right? But the people, who do succeed, the ones doing the right thing, are they less worthy of attention? Shouldn’t they receive some praise for their success?  … Read entire article »

Filed under: 12-Steps, addiction, Alcoholics Anonymous, Beit T'Shuvah, Community, Dating, Gratitude, Sobriety, Spirituality, Uncategorized

Questions From A Normie #3

By Chris Alvarez                         Can you still go out to clubs and bars? Going out to clubs and bars was something I really enjoyed.  It was a time when I could let loose, act crazy and hit on girls.  99.9% of the time I had to be drunk to do it.  However, now I can act crazy without being drunk, can have fun while being sober, and can have enough self-confidence to approach women and accept being shot down.  That’s how I operate now.  Nevertheless the ability to go out to bars and clubs can differ from person to person.  Some people can go out, while others can’t.  It all depends on what triggers you have and how well you deal with … Read entire article »

Filed under: 12-Steps, addiction, Alcoholics Anonymous, Dating, Sobriety, Uncategorized

Birthday Bash = Huge Success!

While Beit T’Shuvah’s multipurpose sanctuary wears many different hats, on Saturday it wore a feathered fedora for Rabbi Mark Borovitz’s 60th birthday party, transforming the sanctuary/dining hall into something barely recognizable. The doors opened to a dimly lit room with small lounge tables speckling the floor, black curtains adorning the walls and tables, and a full booze-less bar complete with cocktails such as the ‘Fuzzy Harriet’ and ‘Lonely Addicts Iced Tea.’ Rabbi’s gangster-themed “Roast and Toast” birthday party turned the Beit T’Shuvah sanctuary into a speakeasy, with guests dressed as 1920’s flappers and mob bosses.  Only at Beit T’Shuvah is it possible to roast your boss and spiritual leader in his own rehab-cum-barlounge.  While the décor was incredible, the Shirley Temples were delicious, and the food was scrumptious, the entertainment was the highlight … Read entire article »

Filed under: addiction, Beit T'Shuvah, Current Events, Dating, Education, Family Wellness, Gratitude, Mark Borovitz, Uncategorized

TGIF? Maybe We Should Thank God on Mondays as Well as Fridays

By M. Alexander Growing up, I hated Mondays.  I hated school. I hated the days I had to go to school, come home and do homework, go to bed early so that I could wake up the next morning for a new day of monotony.  All week, I looked forward to the weekend—a time with no responsibility, a time to watch television, a time to do nothing. Later in life, when I was using heroin, all days were the same.  It did not matter whether it was Saturday or Monday.  If I had dope, it was a good day.  If I didn’t, it was a bad day. My perception of each day’s merits changed yet again when I first got to Beit T’Shuvah. I began to dread the weekend.  Nobody was here.  They … Read entire article »

Filed under: Beit T'Shuvah, BTS Communications, Dating, Family Wellness, Gratitude, Internet, Sobriety, Spirituality

10 Answers on Dating, Sex, Age, Gender, Religion, Faith, Sobriety, and Rules

By M. Alexander This week, I have spent a lot of time speaking with Ilana Angel, writer of “Keeping the Faith”, The Jewish Journal’s most popular blog.  Ilana writes a lot about dating—she is a single, 45 year old mother.  I am a single, 22 year old recovering heroin addict.  We began to discuss dating, relationships, and sex—immediately realizing our many differences. She called me “Pig.”  I called her “Neurotic.”  We decided to each answer a series of dating-related questions—are we really so different?  ———————————————————————————- WHAT DO YOU THINK TO YOURSELF BEFORE YOU MEET YOUR DATE? MICHAEL: Sometimes I think, “Damn, I’m handsome, smart, and charming.  If she doesn’t fall for me, she’s probably dense and blind.”  Other times I think “What was she thinking when she agreed to go out with me?  She … Read entire article »

Filed under: addiction, Dating, Gratitude, Sobriety, Temple

In this weeks parashah, we find the Israelite community, post-revelation at Mt. Sinai, continuing t ...(read more)

Rabbi wants to hear from you, email him with comments or questions about this weeks Torah Portion here.
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